Hey, happy to help =]
1&2) To make the gray bar "hit the top" you can open style.css and change the following:
#head{ .. } to
#head {
height: 107px;
position: relative;
z-index: 5;
}
Remove the following from #mani{ ...}: padding-top: 40px;
Add the following to #content{ ... } :
margin-top: 40px;
If you want your content to be a little higher or lower you can play around with those 40px.
These steps seem to suffice for what you're trying to achieve.
3) You can open style.css and find #sidebar{ }, here you can adjust the padding & width accordingly. When you increase your padding by 5 your width should decrease by 5.
example:
#sidebar{padding:10px 5px}
This means a padding of 10px for top and 10px for bottom (so width decreases by 20) and 5px for left & right. If you put 4 values it is Top Right Bottom Left.
I hope this suffices.